Politically correct descriptions of Men And Women

Due to the climate of political correctness now pervading America ,


Kentuckians, Tennesseans and West Virginians will no longer be referred to as 'HILLBILLIES.'


You must now refer to them as APPALACHIAN-AMERICANS .




And furthermore

HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT WOMEN AND BE POLITICALLY CORRECT:
  1. She is not a 'BABE' or a 'CHICK' - She is a ' BREASTED AMERICAN.'
  2. She is not 'EASY' - She is 'HORIZONTALLY ACCESSIBLE.'
  3. She is not a 'DUMB BLONDE' - She is a 'LIGHT-HAIRED DETOUR OFF THE INFORMATION SUPERHIGHWAY.'
  4. She has not 'BEEN AROUND' - She is a 'PREVIOUSLY-ENJOYED COMPANION.'
  5. She does not 'NAG' you - She becomes ' VERBALLY REPETITIVE.'

She is not a 'TWO-BIT HOOKER' - She is a ' LOW COST PROVIDER.'

HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT MEN AND BE POLITICALLY CORRECT:

  1. He does not have a 'BEER GUT' - He has developed a 'LIQUID GRAIN STORAGE FACILITY.'
  2. He is not a 'BAD DANCER' - He is ' OVERLY CAUCASIAN.'
  3. He does not 'GET LOST ALL THE TIME' - He ' INVESTIGATES ALTERNATIVE DESTINATIONS.'
  4. He is not 'BALDING' - He is in 'FOLLICLE REGRESSION.'
  5. He does not act like a 'TOTAL BUTT' - He develops a case of 'RECTAL-CRANIAL INVERSION.'
  6. It's not his 'CRACK' you see hanging out of his pants - It's 'REAR CLEAVAGE.'