Top 10 (well, 16) police comments when handing out tickets

These 16 Police Comments were taken from actual police car videos around the country:


#16 "You know, stop lights don't come any redder than the one you just went through."



#15 "Relax, the handcuffs are tight because they're new. They'll stretch after you wear them a while."



# 14 "If you take your hands off the car, I'll make your birth certificate a worthless document."



#13 "If you run, you'll only go to jail tired."



#12 "Can you run faster than 1200 feet per second? Because that's the speed of the bullet that'll be chasing you."



#11 "You don't know how fast you were going? I guess that means I can write anything I want on the ticket, is that right?"



#10 "Yes, sir, you can talk to the shift supervisor, but I don't think it will help. Oh, did I mention that I'm the shift supervisor?"



#9 "Warning! You want a warning? O..K. then - I'm warning you not to do that again or I'll give you another ticket."



#8 "The answer to this last question will determine whether you are Drunk or not. Here's the question: Was Mickey Mouse a cat or a dog?"



#7 "Fair? You want me to be fair? Listen, "fair" is a place where you Go to ride on rides, eat cotton candy and corn dogs and step in monkey poop. Sign right here!"



#6 "Yeah, we have a quota. Two more tickets and my wife gets a Toaster oven."



#5 "In God we trust, all others we run through NCIC."



#4 "How big were those 'Just two beers' you say you had?"



#3 "No sir, we don't have quotas anymore. We used to, but now we're allowed to write as many tickets as we want to."



#2 "I'm glad to hear that Chief (of Police) Hawker is a personal friend of yours. So you know someone who can post your bail."





AND THE WINNER IS....

#1 "You didn't think we give pretty women tickets? You're right, we don't. Sign right here, lady."